Ashton Kutcher, Demi Moore and Me

So....have you heard?  Apparently Ashton Kutcher cheated on Demi Moore!!!  Demi Moore?!  Who in their right mind would cheat on Demi Moore?  One would think there is no hope for us all if Demi Moore couldn't keep her man happy right?? Wrong!  This news supports mine and Terry's theory that affairs are never about the sex or the looks.  Oh sure that aids the process, but really it reveals an affliction of the heart.  A longing to be filled that is rarely ever just physical.  I have experienced despair of the soul.  A longing for things to be made right.  For peace.  For love.  For justification.  Every time a situation occurs that hurts or wounds me or someone I love, I question "Lord, how do I handle this? How do You want me to respond?" Oh sure I experience anger, frustration, sorrow, the want of revenge.  But the Lord has taught me in the midst of these emotions to seek His voice otherwise I make a bigger mess.  Just now I was alone doing laundry.  Ahh, alone.  Rare moments of a home schooling moms life.  Anyway, I was thinking.  Have you ever noticed the way us women can think of two things at one time?  This was one of those moments.  I was mulling over a situation my family is dealing with and questioning God with the whys.  At the same time I had praise music going and I was grateful that I had spent time in His word this morning and how it comforted me.  Then I had one of those times when God shouts over my thoughts and the noise.  He said "See, Carrie.  All of these trials, all of these tear filled days of the past and present have created in you a longing for Me and My Word." Yes. Yes it has.  We all have longings.  We can let them be filled by Him and through Him or we can turn to the world for fulfillment.  The problem with the world, as we all know, doesn't fill.  It doesn't last.  It creates a bigger longing.  More darker and deeper than before.  Remember Jesus at the well with the woman.  I am the woman at the well.  You are the woman at the well.  You may not be an adulteress, or Ashton Kutcher, but you have longings, troubles, unmet desires.  He offers the water, the truth, His Spirit.  What will we choose?
    Dear Father help us not to miss the grand point of this life.  To know you, glorify you and enjoy You forever.  My heart aches God.  My sisters may ache.  May we bring our empty jars to You and no one else.  We may never know the whys of this problem or that but we know the Who.  Amen.
Pressing On,
Carrie

God give me strength to give something from nothing....

This morning Terry and I had what you may call "intense fellowship"  Not big, not loud, but disagreement.  Now God has really been working on my heart lately, especially my anger.  I just heard some of you gasp.."Carrie struggle with anger"???  I know you all thought I was perfect!:)  But I do.  Big ugly bad temper.  I would love to blame this on my dad but God took that excuse and smashed it.  I struggle with anger cause I am a big rotten sinner who likes everything to go my way all the time.  I say when, I say who, I say how!  You get the picture???  Anyway, this morning after we had "had words" I had a decision I had to make....Was I going to make this husband of mine breakfast like I always do or was I going to toss a cereal bar at his face on the way out the door?  God whispered...and I knew I had to let Him have control of me and this pot that was boiling.  I decided I was going to cook him a BIG breakfast!  Your right God lets KILL him with kindness.  Then God whispered again...but it was hard to hear over the slamming of pots and pans and cabinet doors.  Eventually He got through.  Was I going to cook this breakfast in the right spirit so my kids could see Christ working through me, so they could see a love for their daddy that goes deeper than any spat, so they could see commitment to a covenant that God ordained. Well I am not sure they saw any of that but I felt an overwhelming blanket of peace cover me from head to toe as I gave in to Christ's prompting.  The issue between Terry and I was not resolved, but I had not sinned in my anger.  Christ working in me provided that big beefy husband of mine with grits, eggs and toast for his day.  And He had slayed the anger beast in me!  This led me to start pondering  all of life's inconveniences and all the excuses we make about falling short.  I have been guilty of losing my temper with my kids and blaming it on them when really it was my poor time management, home organizing skills or the fact that I had slept too late for a quiet time with the Lord, that stressed me that made me lash out.  We say we don't have the time, strength, energy to do the tasks that He has clearly set before us.  And we don't.  But with all my heart I believe that if our priorities are in line with His and we come up short of time, strength, energy, resources, patience, love, faith, forgiveness that is where He wants us.  Beyond ourselves so He gets the glory.  He fills in the gaps and stretches us farther than we ever thought we could.  It was not Carrie who got the praise or glory.  Not I who did it right.  Not I who got the credit as I handed that shocked man of mine his plate.  But Christ.  O sweet Christ working in me. Me, a busted, broken clay pot.   As I type, I am moved to tears that someone so perfect didn't give up on me.  Didn't wash His hands of me.  Didn't say to God "we have convicted her of her temper for the last time.  She just doesn't get it".  No, He stayed till I got it and is teaching me a new song. Oh, how I love Jesus.  I want to urge you to give beyond your means today with me.  If there is someone God has told you to love, forgive, spend time with and encourage and you have put it off, don't any longer.  Give out of your shortcoming.  Give out of your fatigue and your empty bank account. (Use wisdom, of course)  And watch Christ use you for His glory.
By the way....we made up!  (Terry wants to aggravate me more often!)
Have a great day!
Pressing On,
Carrie